For those of you who don't my mom, Susan, she is a real trip! She says what she means and she means what she says. On top of that, she doesn't really care where she is or who she's with when she says it. I used to be embarrassed by this but I am actually learning to appreciate and envy it. I mean, she NEVER comes from a bad place and her intentions are always good. She just can't help it...when she thinks it, she must say it. For example, my mom and I were at Dunkin Donuts recently and we bumped in to a neighbor of hers who had her 5 year-old daughter with her. We were talking with them about the dancing school and that the little girl was going to dancing that day (very pg conversation). My mom turns to me and says, “Remember when so and so got her period at dancing and Miss. Maria talked to the class about periods? That’s what a dance teacher should be.” It had apparently slipped her mind that 1. we were talking to a neighbor, not an old friend, and period talk was probably not the most appropriate convo and 2. WE WERE TALKING TO A 5-YEAR OLD and (again) period talk was probably not the most appropriate convo. I just rolled my eyes, ignored her, and tried to keep going with the conversation. So, what did my mom do? She repeated herself, LOUDER THIS TIME. Because she assumed that I hadn’t heard. Oy!
For most people the
phrase “she has lost her mind” is an insult.
For my mom it is truth… at least partially. In March, 2009 my mother had surgery to remove the hippocampus on the right side of her brain. This part of her brain was severely damaged
and caused seizures that required her to be on extremely powerful medications
with horrible side effects, made her unable to drive or work, and caused
additional (and unfortunately irreparable) brain damage. The damage to the hippocampus has made her a little…um, unpredictable. My mom has became notorious for her lack of
“filter” (although sometimes I am not so sure that she ever really had a filter). For
people who don’t know my mom’s history, she could definitely be taken the wrong
way. Strangers just can’t appreciate her
“tell it like (she thinks) it is”
attitude. Even
today I sometimes think “Oh my Lord, that did not just come out of her mouth”. Although I still have “oy”
moments, for the most part I have actually learned to love this about my mom. She can be very entertaining and you NEVER
have to guess what she is thinking. Her
honesty is refreshing (even if it is sometimes inappropriate). Sometimes, I wish that I could be as much of
a straight-shooter as she is. It’s not that
I am not honest with people, because I think I am. However, I do find myself watching
what I say because I don’t want to argue, hurt feelings, or offend. Wouldn’t it be great if we could all just say
exactly what’s on our mind...and have an excuse for doing it?
It has been three years
since my mom’s surgery and I am so proud of how far she has come. Although she still can’t drive or work, she
is incredibly independent and leads a very full life. On top of that she has recently lost over 50
pounds and is now wearing MY pre-pregnancy clothes. She is “hot stuff” in so many senses of the
word. For those of you who do know my mom,
you know that to say she is quirky doesn’t even begin to explain it, but she
could not possibly be any more entertaining.
And, thankfully, she is still filter-less. So in honor of my mom on her three-year
anniversary of being brainless (ha, ha), I wanted to write this blog to remind everyone that it is ok to have a little Susan syndrome every now and again, as long as your intentions are good. Just say what's on your mind...but don't talk about periods with a 5-year old. Unless you have brain damage too, that is just not ok.
Until next time...
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